Have you ever hurt for your child? I mean really, really hurt? Now, I'm not talking about being a little sad that your son made a B on his report card, or hurting for your daughter who didn't make it for cheerleader this year...even though of course, those things can be tough too! But, I'm talking deeper than that. Have you ever found yourself in a place where you have desperately grieved for them, over them, cried out to God on behalf of them, felt intense pain & sadness for something they were experiencing, suffering, or having to walk through in life?
Have you ever awakened in the middle of the night thinking of them, found yourself praying in the wee hours of the morning? Have you consistently found yourself on your face before God, bringing their name, needs, before Him once again? Have you wondered how life can seem to go on "joyfully" around you, when inside, there's such turmoil, uncertainty, & deep hurt? Has it been hard to watch when others don't seem to have to "struggle" as much through life? Does life seem unfair at times? Does God seem to be distant? Or have you ever felt His closeness, His loving whispers over you, over your child, through those most difficult of times?
Some of you reading this right now have experienced these things to a much greater degree than I could ever imagine at this point in life. Some of you reading this might be saying, "Huh?" Maybe your journey just hasn't taken you to those places at this point, that's O.K. Maybe many of us find ourselves somewhere in between those extremes, but whatever the case...here's one thing I'm learning this year...being a mom, a parent, is the hardest thing I've ever done in my life! It just plain HURTS sometimes. I realized something about myself recently that God is still continuing to help me to work through. I honestly don't have a strong need or desire to have "perfect" children, I realize how imperfect my own life is, & how imperfect they are too, but I do struggle immensely in another way. I have felt such an extreme need to protect them, maybe even over-protect at times, from having to experience any "pain" in life. I admit it. I don't want them to have to hurt, as foolish & unrealistic as that sounds, it hurts me intensely to watch our children suffer through anything! And, maybe that's what it really boils down to as well..."I" don't want to have to hurt either. Maybe that can be even more of a challenge for those of us parents who have experienced extreme disappointment in our own lives, we know how "raw" that hurt can be, we know that process of grief, the obstacles that must be overcome to come through even stronger with God's help, we know from our own experiences, it's just tough to face pain!
So through all that "fresh" realization, God has been reminding me of something that, quite honestly, I didn't really care to be reminded of, but I know I need to be...it's this...we all must & will experience pain at times throughout life. I mean, come on, who really GROWS stronger spiritually, emotionally, physically when life is always easy??? NOONE! We just don't! We have such opportunity for growth, for deep roots to be firmly planted, for strong character to develop, during those times in life that are just plain HARD! Ugh! My flesh wants to cry, "please, tell me it isn't so!" But it is, it is so. And deep inside, we probably all know that.
A friend recently commented something about this photo here. I didn't even notice it when I looked at it initially, but she said to me, "Wow, did you see what's above your heads? Make - Man - Must." I looked, I gulped, hard. When I saw it there staring me in the face, I just had a really "unsettled" feeling, but I knew deep inside it was God speaking to me. He was once again saying to me in His incredible & yet gentle way, that "He" is in the business of building strong men & women out of our children whom He has so graciously blessed us with & given us the enormous responsibility to raise. You see, as much as we like to think that our children are "ours" & "BELONG" to us, it's just not true! Our children are God's & they belong to Him, "we" are responsible to love them, care for them, parent them, & raise to them to know His incredible love, purposes & power.
He's just not "into" making life always "easy" for us & making sure everyone is always "happy" in this world. Nope, you just won't find that about God anywhere in the Bible & really, even if you look around you, or in your own family, you probably won't find it there! Now, let me be clear on this, GOD IS LOVING, GOD IS CARING, HE DOES LOVE TO GIVE GOOD GIFTS TO HIS CHILDREN, but His love & His goodness sometimes finds deeper purposes revealed through the most difficult of circumstances life takes us through. Life isn't always fair. We live in a place, planet earth, well, it's just not heaven, it's not a perfect place, & it's not our final home if we have faith in Jesus Christ. It's fallen, it's imperfect, it has disease, it's full of addictions, it's full of temptations, it's full of challenges, it's full of us - people - who often just make poor choices that unfortunately affect others too.
So, I continue on this journey of motherhood. It will never be pain free, I know. I'm continuing to grow...I'm realizing that God cares more for the good of our children than I ever could...I'm remembering that He is with them ALL the time, even the times that I can't be...I'm learning that yes, pain hurts, but it's not always "bad," sometimes it's for a greater purpose...I'm learning that I can release my own "need" for control to a loving God who is MIGHTY, POWERFUL, & GOOD...I find comfort in His words, in being able to bring every thought, fear, & challenge before Him in prayer.
Bless you my dear friends who have suffered much in walking through heartaches beside your children or in your families. YOU are an inspiration to me!
Many of you continue to persevere through the challenges of autism, Down's Syndrome, developmental & learning disabilities, disease, cancer, & other chronic conditions. Many of you know the heartache of watching your child run through seasons of rebellion & addictions. Many of you know the feeling of having no control or the ability to make things better. Many of you know the pain of watching your teenager or adult child continue to choose to live in spiritual darkness. Many of you understand the hurt of watching your "healthy" child suffer hurt on behalf of a sibling they love so deeply. Many of you have watched as your child grieves along with you through the death of a loved one or through a divorce that has literally shaken your family's very core.
Some of you grieve silently, continually, the journey has been long. For some of you, the pain in your own life has begun to find a "voice" that is now able to encourage & challenge others onward who also suffer.
Be assured - God will use our lives, any hurt we may face, for greater purposes in this world as we allow Him to - that is just the amazing ability only HE has! Maybe some of those purposes & plans we'll never even see completely unfold in our lifetime. BUT HE IS ABLE.
Ah yes, there is pain in parenting, isn't there? But I wouldn't trade it for the world...and I know you wouldn't either.
"Though the mountains be shaken and the hills be removed, yet my unfailing love for you will not be shaken nor my covenant of peace be removed, says the Lord, who has compassion on you...All your sons will be taught by the Lord, and great will be your children's peace." Isaiah 54:10,13
Have you ever awakened in the middle of the night thinking of them, found yourself praying in the wee hours of the morning? Have you consistently found yourself on your face before God, bringing their name, needs, before Him once again? Have you wondered how life can seem to go on "joyfully" around you, when inside, there's such turmoil, uncertainty, & deep hurt? Has it been hard to watch when others don't seem to have to "struggle" as much through life? Does life seem unfair at times? Does God seem to be distant? Or have you ever felt His closeness, His loving whispers over you, over your child, through those most difficult of times?
Some of you reading this right now have experienced these things to a much greater degree than I could ever imagine at this point in life. Some of you reading this might be saying, "Huh?" Maybe your journey just hasn't taken you to those places at this point, that's O.K. Maybe many of us find ourselves somewhere in between those extremes, but whatever the case...here's one thing I'm learning this year...being a mom, a parent, is the hardest thing I've ever done in my life! It just plain HURTS sometimes. I realized something about myself recently that God is still continuing to help me to work through. I honestly don't have a strong need or desire to have "perfect" children, I realize how imperfect my own life is, & how imperfect they are too, but I do struggle immensely in another way. I have felt such an extreme need to protect them, maybe even over-protect at times, from having to experience any "pain" in life. I admit it. I don't want them to have to hurt, as foolish & unrealistic as that sounds, it hurts me intensely to watch our children suffer through anything! And, maybe that's what it really boils down to as well..."I" don't want to have to hurt either. Maybe that can be even more of a challenge for those of us parents who have experienced extreme disappointment in our own lives, we know how "raw" that hurt can be, we know that process of grief, the obstacles that must be overcome to come through even stronger with God's help, we know from our own experiences, it's just tough to face pain!
So through all that "fresh" realization, God has been reminding me of something that, quite honestly, I didn't really care to be reminded of, but I know I need to be...it's this...we all must & will experience pain at times throughout life. I mean, come on, who really GROWS stronger spiritually, emotionally, physically when life is always easy??? NOONE! We just don't! We have such opportunity for growth, for deep roots to be firmly planted, for strong character to develop, during those times in life that are just plain HARD! Ugh! My flesh wants to cry, "please, tell me it isn't so!" But it is, it is so. And deep inside, we probably all know that.
A friend recently commented something about this photo here. I didn't even notice it when I looked at it initially, but she said to me, "Wow, did you see what's above your heads? Make - Man - Must." I looked, I gulped, hard. When I saw it there staring me in the face, I just had a really "unsettled" feeling, but I knew deep inside it was God speaking to me. He was once again saying to me in His incredible & yet gentle way, that "He" is in the business of building strong men & women out of our children whom He has so graciously blessed us with & given us the enormous responsibility to raise. You see, as much as we like to think that our children are "ours" & "BELONG" to us, it's just not true! Our children are God's & they belong to Him, "we" are responsible to love them, care for them, parent them, & raise to them to know His incredible love, purposes & power.
He's just not "into" making life always "easy" for us & making sure everyone is always "happy" in this world. Nope, you just won't find that about God anywhere in the Bible & really, even if you look around you, or in your own family, you probably won't find it there! Now, let me be clear on this, GOD IS LOVING, GOD IS CARING, HE DOES LOVE TO GIVE GOOD GIFTS TO HIS CHILDREN, but His love & His goodness sometimes finds deeper purposes revealed through the most difficult of circumstances life takes us through. Life isn't always fair. We live in a place, planet earth, well, it's just not heaven, it's not a perfect place, & it's not our final home if we have faith in Jesus Christ. It's fallen, it's imperfect, it has disease, it's full of addictions, it's full of temptations, it's full of challenges, it's full of us - people - who often just make poor choices that unfortunately affect others too.
So, I continue on this journey of motherhood. It will never be pain free, I know. I'm continuing to grow...I'm realizing that God cares more for the good of our children than I ever could...I'm remembering that He is with them ALL the time, even the times that I can't be...I'm learning that yes, pain hurts, but it's not always "bad," sometimes it's for a greater purpose...I'm learning that I can release my own "need" for control to a loving God who is MIGHTY, POWERFUL, & GOOD...I find comfort in His words, in being able to bring every thought, fear, & challenge before Him in prayer.
Bless you my dear friends who have suffered much in walking through heartaches beside your children or in your families. YOU are an inspiration to me!
Many of you continue to persevere through the challenges of autism, Down's Syndrome, developmental & learning disabilities, disease, cancer, & other chronic conditions. Many of you know the heartache of watching your child run through seasons of rebellion & addictions. Many of you know the feeling of having no control or the ability to make things better. Many of you know the pain of watching your teenager or adult child continue to choose to live in spiritual darkness. Many of you understand the hurt of watching your "healthy" child suffer hurt on behalf of a sibling they love so deeply. Many of you have watched as your child grieves along with you through the death of a loved one or through a divorce that has literally shaken your family's very core.
Some of you grieve silently, continually, the journey has been long. For some of you, the pain in your own life has begun to find a "voice" that is now able to encourage & challenge others onward who also suffer.
Be assured - God will use our lives, any hurt we may face, for greater purposes in this world as we allow Him to - that is just the amazing ability only HE has! Maybe some of those purposes & plans we'll never even see completely unfold in our lifetime. BUT HE IS ABLE.
Ah yes, there is pain in parenting, isn't there? But I wouldn't trade it for the world...and I know you wouldn't either.
"Though the mountains be shaken and the hills be removed, yet my unfailing love for you will not be shaken nor my covenant of peace be removed, says the Lord, who has compassion on you...All your sons will be taught by the Lord, and great will be your children's peace." Isaiah 54:10,13
1 comment:
These are some great words that I needed to hear. Thank You!
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