Well, our summer has ended and, ready or not, the new journey of "real school" has begun! Our oldest "baby" started kindergarten yesterday and yes, there were definitely some tears involved, his & mine! (Although I tried hard not to let him see mine.)
I know that many of you have recently or will soon, kiss your "babies" goodbye & watch them leave for college, oh my, I can hardly imagine right now, my heart is truly with you, especially after yesterday!
Dressed in his cute, new school uniform (which Dawson insists is "cool," not cute), armed with his Hot Wheels backpack & Spider Man lunch box, he was ready for the day. When we first walked into the class, we thought, "perfect!". The teacher was warm & friendly, some of his best buddies were in there with him, but, to Daws, at that moment in time, it didn't really matter, he just knew he wanted to go home. The tears began to well up in his eyes, I could see from the look on his face, that this was going to be a very, very long day - for both of us! what had happened??? Where did we go wrong? We were not prepared for this reaction! This is the day that he had looked forward to for soooo long, this was our secure, confident, "can easily adapt to any new situation" child! I could hardly pull myself away from the room, my heart was breaking for my baby! I thought the teacher may have to firmly & kindly ask me to leave, but thankfully my dear husband was able to pull me out before things got worse!
Dawson continued to tell us last night that he had decided he did NOT want to go to kindergarten anymore, that he would just prefer to stay home with mommy & Noah & Gracie, there were more tears, & lots of attempts to negotiate some kind of deal. (: Troy & I tried desperately to pull out every counseling tactic & parenting skill we knew, we tried to remember every old cheer from high school, "go for it", "you can do it", etc...we thought, we pondered, we prayed, there just had to be some easy solution to get him excited about going back to kindergarten & encourage him onward!
I was emotionally drained by the time he left the house this morning, Troy took Daws to class & said he did a "little better."
And then later as I was praying, I realized that this was yet another time God was teaching me & trying to get my attention through my children. I thought of how similar to this I had felt so many times in life...almost as if this journey of life we're on is just life "one big first day of kindergarten," full of moments of excitement as the big day draws near for whatever it is we're looking forward to, and then, IT happens, even when you least expect it! You begin to realize you feel kind of uncertain in this "new" situation, you can't really "see" God right there with you & you start wondering if He really is there, things look a lot different, people look different, you just want to go home where it's safe & secure, where things are familiar, you realize you are feeling very AFRAID & ALONE! Ever been there? I thought about how much I think of Dawson & want him to be O.K. & realized again how much God must think of us & want us to feel His love over us, how much He wants us to know that He IS with us, even when we can't see Him.
I picked my little guy up from school today & the first thing he said is "Oh mom, I had an AWESOME day!" Oh yea, I wanted to jump & scream & shout hooray, I was sooooo glad to hear those words, so glad that he was O.K.! God must feel that same way towards us, his heart so full of love for us, when we face the difficult challenges in our days & then are able to come out on the other side with JOY. He must just want to shout & sing over us! He is so good, He loves us with such an incredible love.
Dawson asked me tonight as I was tucking him into bed, "Mom, how many more days of school do we have left? Let's see, we've had 1 day, 2 days, how many more days until summer?" Oh my, it may be a very long year. (:
Praying that God will be close to you today, that He will "quiet you with His love, that He will rejoice over you with singing." Zeph. 3:17
I know that many of you have recently or will soon, kiss your "babies" goodbye & watch them leave for college, oh my, I can hardly imagine right now, my heart is truly with you, especially after yesterday!
Dressed in his cute, new school uniform (which Dawson insists is "cool," not cute), armed with his Hot Wheels backpack & Spider Man lunch box, he was ready for the day. When we first walked into the class, we thought, "perfect!". The teacher was warm & friendly, some of his best buddies were in there with him, but, to Daws, at that moment in time, it didn't really matter, he just knew he wanted to go home. The tears began to well up in his eyes, I could see from the look on his face, that this was going to be a very, very long day - for both of us! what had happened??? Where did we go wrong? We were not prepared for this reaction! This is the day that he had looked forward to for soooo long, this was our secure, confident, "can easily adapt to any new situation" child! I could hardly pull myself away from the room, my heart was breaking for my baby! I thought the teacher may have to firmly & kindly ask me to leave, but thankfully my dear husband was able to pull me out before things got worse!
Dawson continued to tell us last night that he had decided he did NOT want to go to kindergarten anymore, that he would just prefer to stay home with mommy & Noah & Gracie, there were more tears, & lots of attempts to negotiate some kind of deal. (: Troy & I tried desperately to pull out every counseling tactic & parenting skill we knew, we tried to remember every old cheer from high school, "go for it", "you can do it", etc...we thought, we pondered, we prayed, there just had to be some easy solution to get him excited about going back to kindergarten & encourage him onward!
I was emotionally drained by the time he left the house this morning, Troy took Daws to class & said he did a "little better."
And then later as I was praying, I realized that this was yet another time God was teaching me & trying to get my attention through my children. I thought of how similar to this I had felt so many times in life...almost as if this journey of life we're on is just life "one big first day of kindergarten," full of moments of excitement as the big day draws near for whatever it is we're looking forward to, and then, IT happens, even when you least expect it! You begin to realize you feel kind of uncertain in this "new" situation, you can't really "see" God right there with you & you start wondering if He really is there, things look a lot different, people look different, you just want to go home where it's safe & secure, where things are familiar, you realize you are feeling very AFRAID & ALONE! Ever been there? I thought about how much I think of Dawson & want him to be O.K. & realized again how much God must think of us & want us to feel His love over us, how much He wants us to know that He IS with us, even when we can't see Him.
I picked my little guy up from school today & the first thing he said is "Oh mom, I had an AWESOME day!" Oh yea, I wanted to jump & scream & shout hooray, I was sooooo glad to hear those words, so glad that he was O.K.! God must feel that same way towards us, his heart so full of love for us, when we face the difficult challenges in our days & then are able to come out on the other side with JOY. He must just want to shout & sing over us! He is so good, He loves us with such an incredible love.
Dawson asked me tonight as I was tucking him into bed, "Mom, how many more days of school do we have left? Let's see, we've had 1 day, 2 days, how many more days until summer?" Oh my, it may be a very long year. (:
Praying that God will be close to you today, that He will "quiet you with His love, that He will rejoice over you with singing." Zeph. 3:17
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